Saturday, February 28, 2009

EA-18G vs F22.... LOL


(The picture above is from the link)
So I saw this on facebook last night when I was on facebook.... I followed it up and found this hilarious story about an EA-18G with a F-22 kill sticker on it...

LOL WTF - THEY ACTUALLY PRINTED THIS

Guest submitter Vince G. sent me this completely insane article from the Irish Times.... I can't believe this actually made it to print..... wow =p He said it was completely insane.... I see what he means ... LOL

Irish Times take on the Credit Crunch

At first I thought this was something from cracked.com... you know like how lion dogs in ancient china were used for short range attacks...

BTW my friend Darren pointed out that this guy is a Satirist who used to work at the Onion, and now does Satire for the Irish times.... lol well... with all the rhetoric you see out there, you can't tell when people are dead serious or dead joking =p

Friday, February 27, 2009

David's Life Postulate

David's Life Reality postulate... 1+ 1 + rand() = 2 + rand() ....Life is such.... Leverage luck and walk proudly into the sunset.

Our generation... is the gaming generation, we thrive on cause/effect work/reward....we are innately aware of complex payoffs... we are natural game theorists.... A thought.... we are not all special snowflakes... we can't all become astronauts and actors... but that doesn't mean you should't try. =) Just remember... when you make all the right moves... do the right things... don't ever for one moment expect that you are owed.... anything.... you still need luck on your side. Make your own luck when you can and be prepared. The golden ring only comes around once...

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Bill Gates - A Management Example


The picture used above is from the Onion Article.... where Bill Gates gives himself 18 Dexterity and 20 Charisma...


So my friend Joe S. mentioned he saw the blog post on the Bill Gates epic rage email... and suggested the following article on joelonsoftware.com. Apparently this dude used to work at Microsoft back in the day, and he tells a tale of high adventure... ok well not quite high adventure but apparently he was fixing a Date problem in Excel and had his first Bill Gates review... here is an excerpt...

"He was flipping through the spec! [Calm down, what are you a little girl?]

... and THERE WERE NOTES IN ALL THE MARGINS. ON EVERY PAGE OF THE SPEC. HE HAD READ THE WHOLE GODDAMNED THING AND WRITTEN NOTES IN THE MARGINS.

He Read The Whole Thing! [OMG SQUEEE!]
"

The interesting thing about this is.... this truly illustrates the idea of "Stapling yourself to an order..." The idea being... to truly understand your organizational supply chain... you need to literally look at what is going in the trenches.... Here is the HBS article that I read back in B-school.... discussing this.

OMC = order management cycle

They "stapled" themselves to an order in the 18 companies they studied, literally following it through every stage of the OMC. Based on this practical approach, the authors point out potential gaps throughout the OMC. For example, marketing and production battles can erupt even during order planning, and some of the fiercest fighting can break out during scheduling, when the sales force may want quick turnarounds that are unrealistic for manufacturing. Most companies don't see the OMC as a whole system, especially because each phase may require a bewildering overlap of functional responsibilities. However, when managers take the time to track each step of the OMC, they'll come into contact with customer service representatives, production schedulers, shipping clerks, and other critically important people. In this article, first published in 1992, the authors contend that managers who "staple themselves to an order" will not only move horizontally across their own organizations, charting gaps and building information bridges; they'll also see the company from the customer's perspective.

As managers this may seem intuitive... but truly... walking amongst the soldiers isn't a terrible idea.... you may find out quite a bit you had no idea about.... and you may find simply AMAZING things going on..... and by AMAZING I mean completely ridiculous... you may also find.... AMAZINGLY awesome things as well....

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Bill Gates Epic Rage Email...

My friend Cassidy sent me this link... here is Bill Gates dropping the LOLCATS rant on Microsoft...

From the article...

---- Original Message ----

From: Bill Gates
Sent: Wednesday, January 15, 2003 10:05 AM
To: Jim Allchin
Cc: Chris Jones (WINDOWS); Bharat Shah (NT); Joe Peterson; Will Poole; Brian Valentine; Anoop Gupta (RESEARCH)
Subject: Windows Usability Systematic degradation flame

I am quite disappointed at how Windows Usability has been going backwards and the program management groups don't drive usability issues.

Let me give you my experience from yesterday.

I decided to download (Moviemaker) and buy the Digital Plus pack ... so I went to Microsoft.com. They have a download place so I went there.

The first 5 times I used the site it timed out while trying to bring up the download page. Then after an 8 second delay I got it to come up.

This site is so slow it is unusable.

It wasn't in the top 5 so I expanded the other 45.

These 45 names are totally confusing. These names make stuff like: C:\Documents and Settings\billg\My Documents\My Pictures seem clear.

They are not filtered by the system ... and so many of the things are strange.

I tried scoping to Media stuff. Still no moviemaker. I typed in movie. Nothing. I typed in movie maker. Nothing.

So I gave up and sent mail to Amir saying - where is this Moviemaker download? Does it exist?

So they told me that using the download page to download something was not something they anticipated.

They told me to go to the main page search button and type movie maker (not moviemaker!).

I tried that. The site was pathetically slow but after 6 seconds of waiting up it came.

I thought for sure now I would see a button to just go do the download.

In fact it is more like a puzzle that you get to solve. It told me to go to Windows Update and do a bunch of incantations.

This struck me as completely odd. Why should I have to go somewhere else and do a scan to download moviemaker?

So I went to Windows update. Windows Update decides I need to download a bunch of controls. (Not) just once but multiple times where I get to see weird dialog boxes.

Doesn't Windows update know some key to talk to Windows?

Then I did the scan. This took quite some time and I was told it was critical for me to download 17megs of stuff.

This is after I was told we were doing delta patches to things but instead just to get 6 things that are labeled in the SCARIEST possible way I had to download 17meg.

So I did the download. That part was fast. Then it wanted to do an install. This took 6 minutes and the machine was so slow I couldn't use it for anything else during this time.

What the heck is going on during those 6 minutes? That is crazy. This is after the download was finished.

Then it told me to reboot my machine. Why should I do that? I reboot every night -- why should I reboot at that time?

So I did the reboot because it INSISTED on it. Of course that meant completely getting rid of all my Outlook state.

So I got back up and running and went to Windows Update again. I forgot why I was in Windows Update at all since all I wanted was to get Moviemaker.

So I went back to Microsoft.com and looked at the instructions. I have to click on a folder called WindowsXP. Why should I do that? Windows Update knows I am on Windows XP.

What does it mean to have to click on that folder? So I get a bunch of confusing stuff but sure enough one of them is Moviemaker.

So I do the download. The download is fast but the Install takes many minutes. Amazing how slow this thing is.

At some point I get told I need to go get Windows Media Series 9 to download.

So I decide I will go do that. This time I get dialogs saying things like "Open" or "Save". No guidance in the instructions which to do. I have no clue which to do.

The download is fast and the install takes 7 minutes for this thing.

So now I think I am going to have Moviemaker. I go to my add/remove programs place to make sure it is there.

It is not there.

What is there? The following garbage is there. Microsoft Autoupdate Exclusive test package, Microsoft Autoupdate Reboot test package, Microsoft Autoupdate testpackage1. Microsoft AUtoupdate testpackage2, Microsoft Autoupdate Test package3.

Someone decided to trash the one part of Windows that was usable? The file system is no longer usable. The registry is not usable. This program listing was one sane place but now it is all crapped up.

But that is just the start of the crap. Later I have listed things like Windows XP Hotfix see Q329048 for more information. What is Q329048? Why are these series of patches listed here? Some of the patches just things like Q810655 instead of saying see Q329048 for more information.

What an absolute mess.

Moviemaker is just not there at all.

So I give up on Moviemaker and decide to download the Digital Plus Package.

I get told I need to go enter a bunch of information about myself.

I enter it all in and because it decides I have mistyped something I have to try again. Of course it has cleared out most of what I typed.

I try (typing) the right stuff in 5 times and it just keeps clearing things out for me to type them in again.

So after more than an hour of craziness and making my programs list garbage and being scared and seeing that Microsoft.com is a terrible website I haven't run Moviemaker and I haven't got the plus package.

The lack of attention to usability represented by these experiences blows my mind. I thought we had reached a low with Windows Network places or the messages I get when I try to use 802.11. (don't you just love that root certificate message?)

When I really get to use the stuff I am sure I will have more feedback.

Wacky Low Stress Job List

So my friend Tim. G sent this to me... It is some author's list of LOW STRESS JOS and I will say... I am kind of confused as to some of the jobs on this list... Check it here... I would have thought that a Sales Manager position would be somewhat stressful.... I haven't ever been a sales manager so I can't really tell though. I know that front line sales in general can be stressful. Unless you are selling dreams and icecream....

1. Computer software engineers, applications
Annual salary: $79,780

2. Computer systems analysts
Annual salary: $69,760

3. Sales managers
Annual salary: $91,560

4. Civil engineers
Annual salary: $68,600

5. Environmental scientists and specialists, including health
Annual salary: $56,100

6. Construction and building inspectors
Annual salary: $46,570

7. Environmental engineers
Annual salary: $69,940

8. Carpenters
Annual salary: $36,550

9. Bus and truck mechanics and diesel engine specialists
Annual salary: $37,660

10. Environmental science and protection technicians, including health
Annual salary: $38,090

11. Painters, construction and maintenance
Annual salary: $31,190

12. Mobile heavy equipment mechanics, except engines
Annual salary: $40,440

13. Cement masons and concrete finishers
Annual salary: $32,650

14. Natural sciences managers
Annual salary: $100,080

15. Industrial machinery mechanics
Annual salary: $41,050

16. Tile and marble setters
Annual salary: $36,590

17. Brickmasons and blockmasons
Annual salary: $42,980

18. Maintenance and repair workers
Annual salary: $31,910

19. Operations research analysts
Annual salary: $64,650

20. Water and liquid waste treatment plant and system operators
Annual salary: $36,070

21. Massage therapists
Annual salary: $33,400

22. Fitness trainers and aerobics instructors
Annual salary: $25,910

23. Civil engineering technicians
Annual salary: $40,560

24. Sheet metal workers
Annual salary: $37,360

25. Mechanical engineers
Annual salary: $69,850

O.G Haute Coutore....























From the movie.... Falling Down.... I give you... old school haute coutore....... LOL... My friend Lynn asked me to find the 1960's equivalent of dress code and I found it.... lol

Friday, February 20, 2009

Super Duper Awesome Credit Crisis Explanation Animation

I saw this on metafilter... and thought I'd share... check this completely awesome animation.... of how it all went down... two thumbs up to this dude... his name is Jonathan Jarvis.... well done...


The Crisis of Credit Visualized from Jonathan Jarvis on Vimeo.

Bullet Proof Weave


Woman's weave is bullet proof.... She must have the NUMBER ONE head band..... =)
Thanks to Tim G for this gem...

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Seeking Alpha on Intrinsic Value

Seeking alpha hits another nice pin on the head with it's article on Intrinsic Value investing... check it out here.

The basic concept being... if you take a firm's future cash projections.... apply a decay so that they don't do equally awesome till infinity.... and then you subtract that firm's debts and liabilities... you can easily see when a firm's current debt is unsurmountable even with its projected future income....

Here is an example from Seeking Alpha.

"In the case of TRMP, SIRI, SIX, and RAD, those companies are so leveraged that the values of their future cash flows are not sufficient to pay off their debt obligations."

It's ironic that only a few years ago, investors would get really pissed off if you were sitting on alot of cash in the piggy bank... oh how the mountains turn into seas....

I'm on a BOAT with T-Pain


This is actually pretty damn good LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks to Brian H. for finding this.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Marketing through a Recession

Generally speaking most firms view Marketing as an expense instead of an investment such as R&D. Having the helm of 'cost center' put upon your brow... the need for ROMI (Return on Marketing Investment) justification may be the only way to get funding. For this exercise I am using the PULL analogy of marketing vs the PUSH analogy of Advertising/Sales. The PULL concept being "identifying customer segment, channel, need, and price" which results in customers realizing that your product offering fits well into their value chain. Take the Boeing 787's efficient air transport fitting well with the operational/logistical needs of major airlines. My definition of Advertising as having a product that is already instantiated and then PUSHING it to people. During recessions many companies cut their marketing budget first. This makes sense for a majority of companies, but for some, it may be an opportunity to lever up. If you believe that marketing drives demand and also identifies customer needs... then cutting marketing may seem circular. HBS professor John Quelch has some interesting things to say in this article I found on Harvard Business Week Marketing Your Way Through a Recession

From the Article
"Instead of cutting the market research budget, you need to know more than ever how consumers are redefining value and responding to the recession. Price elasticity curves are changing. Consumers take more time searching for durable goods and negotiate harder at the point of sale. They are more willing to postpone purchases, trade down, or buy less. Must-have features of yesterday are today's can-live-withouts. Trusted brands are especially valued and they can still launch new products successfully, but interest in new brands and new categories fades. Conspicuous consumption becomes less prevalent."

Marketing/Advertising is still black magic to me though... it is best stated in the words of Lord Leverhulme of Unilever....
"Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted, and the problem is I do not know which half"

1851-1925, British founder of Unilever and philanthropist

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Street Fighter 4 Totally SOLD OUT in Japan in 1 day


So apparently Street Fighter 4 has totally SOLD OUT in Japan... in one day... check the info out here.

"Looks like Japanese gamers still have a lot of love for the original World Warriors. Reports are circulating that Street Fighter 4 has sold 86,000 copies in its first day of release in Japan, with Capcom themselves saying the game has completely sold out."

My Epic XBOXLIVE Avatar


My totally sweet XBOXLIVE Avatar... btw... Street Fighter 4 hits the street on Feb 17th... see you guys on XBOXLIVE =)

Monday, February 16, 2009

Severance the Movie
























So I decided to finally watch this movie Severance after seeing the previews a few months ago.... I'm glad I did.... it's a movie about these DEFENSE CONTRACTOR execs who go on a TEAM BUILDING retreat... in the forests of Hungary.... anyhow people start dying... the funny part about this is.. it has an unusual balance of humor and saw 3 like violence.... One of the things I found quite amusing was that they hit several key 'officemate' archetypes... Check out the Rotten Tomatoes review HERE.. it got a 65% in Sweet Tomato Goodness...

Saturday, February 14, 2009

The Science of Kissing

I saw this hilarious article on CNN.com on the Science behind Kissing. This quote is pretty hilarious in its cold 'matter of fact' language.... =)

"On the basis of brain imaging, Fisher proposes that there are three distinct brain systems involved in mating and reproduction: sex drive, romantic love, and attachment. Sex drive compels us to seek partners, romantic love tells us to commit to one, and attachment helps us "tolerate this person at least long enough" to have a child, she said. Kissing evolved to stimulate all three of these systems, she said."

More VIX

Here are 10 things everyone should know about the VIX from VixandMore.blogspot.com. NOTE: This should not be confused with the VIG. Here is a link to the Chicago Board of Exchange White paper on the VIX

From the White Paper
The most significant change is a new method of calculation. The new VIX estimates expected volatility from the prices of stock index options in a wide range of strike prices, not just at-the-money strikes as in the original VIX. Also, the new VIX is not calculated from the Black Scholes option pricing model; the calculation is independent of any model. The new VIX uses a newly developed formula to derive expected volatility by averaging the weighted prices of out-of-the money puts and calls. This simple and powerful derivation is based on theoretical results that have spurred the growth of a new market where risk managers and hedge funds can trade volatility, and market makers can hedge volatility trades with listed options.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Golden Ticket... well more like Green Ticket

















From the land of too awesome and too ridiculous to be true we have this gem..... I almost died when I saw entry on Boingboing.net about a Movie promotion that gives out tickets to ... AMSTERDAM and a bag of controlled substances... Oh how awesome is that marketing department, apparently they must have slipped this by legal somehow...

Teenage MUTANT Ninja HIV Fighting Stem Cells


Holy Crap... epic mutant stem cells.... Check the story here!

A 42-year-old HIV patient with leukemia appears to have no detectable HIV in his blood and no symptoms after a stem cell transplant from a donor carrying a gene mutation that confers natural resistance to the virus that causes AIDS, according to a report published Wednesday in the New England Journal of Medicine.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Darwing and the Vatican Form like Voltron


In an epic turn of events.... the Vatican has formed like Voltron with Darwin... in as much as to say that Christianity (Catholicism at least) is compatible with Evolution. I just can't wait to see them bust out with Blazing Sword... Check the Telegraph news story here

Archbishop Gianfranco Ravasi, head of the Pontifical Council for Culture, said while the Church had been hostile to Darwin's theory in the past, the idea of evolution could be traced to St Augustine and St Thomas Aquinas.

Father Giuseppe Tanzella-Nitti, Professor of Theology at the Pontifical Santa Croce University in Rome, added that 4th century theologian St Augustine had "never heard the term evolution, but knew that big fish eat smaller fish" and forms of life had been transformed "slowly over time". Aquinas made similar observations in the Middle Ages.

Ahead of a papal-backed conference next month marking the 150th anniversary of Darwin's On the Origin of Species, the Vatican is also set to play down the idea of Intelligent Design, which argues a "higher power" must be responsible for the complexities of life.

Monsignor Ravasi said Darwin's theories had never been formally condemned by the Roman Catholic Church, pointing to comments more than 50 years ago, when Pope Pius XII described evolution as a valid scientific approach to the development of humans.

St. Louis wins.... Forbes award for 10th Most Miserable City In America


All I have to say is ROFLCOPTER.... Thanks for the find Tim G.
Here is the link to the Forbes Slide Show

The world is not flat, it's converging to a point..


Update: Thanks to Jamie S. for finding this 2008 version of the video below... watch them both... they have different l33t graphics and epicly different data slices =)


So I saw this video today during a staff meeting, and I thought it was pretty cool so I went out and found the same video on youtube. It has some very interesting factiods. It was originally made to show to a school board, in order to pose the question of, "what are you doing to prepare my child for the 21st century." The original intent aside... some of the numbers are staggering. For more information on the original site, check it out here at Shifthappens.wikispaces.com

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Cooler than Sliced Bread with Nutella








So I came across this phenom the other day when I was reading about how we learn behaviors and such.... check out Mirror Neurons here at Wikipedia and here in this NYTimes Article.. on Mirror Neurons. The basic concept is that primates and other animals have these brain neurons that both fire to control your body movements and also fire when you see someone else (or another animal) carry out that action. Humans are thought to have an equivalent system but not specifically individual mirror neurons. You don't physically act out the action spontaneously, but your brain fires off the same sequence that would normally cause the physical action. So when you see someone punch a koala bear in the face, your brain fires off the same set of neurons that you would require to punch another furry forest animal in the face. They believe that we have some sort of equivalent system and that it is responsible for how we learn things and perhaps may be the root of our ability to empathize. In a side note, I read this study a while back about the effectiveness of laugh tracks in movies. The idea being, even when things are not funny. Humans are conditioned to laugh in response to someone else laughing. Perhaps this contagious laughter is driven by mirror neurons causing you to laugh back. This would be super hilarious if your mirror neurons would fire off AND cause you to actually carry out the action.. versus just running a 'simulation' in your brain. This kind of makes me think of the girl in Heroes who can copy anything just by watching... and also the puppet master guy. Anyhow... the monkey picture above just makes me laugh really hard for some reason....

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Response to Damn it Feels good to be a Banker...


LOL... I don't know what to say. My buddy Kyle K. sent me this"this video is similar (to the other IB vs Consultant Video) in the way 180 degrees is to 0 degrees. "

My favorite line is To Branders "When the Soda dries wtf you gonna do?, I got an MBA but can't pay my bills..." Rofl.... Again I don't know what to say..... CAPM, Black-Scholes, CDO's.... Sometimes, no response... is better than a response. =)

Friday, February 6, 2009

To Suit or Not to Suit / The Straddle Question


When my friends an I first started going to Business School for our MBA's we started wearing ties and suit/ties to work every day, I did this for about a year and a half. It was interesting because our general work place style is Business Casual. I really don't like the idea of business casual in a way... it's a lot like straddling... I'd rather either go to work in a Metalocalypse T-Shirt with Shell tops on.... or go in full tilt business suit attire. The business casual combination of slacks, dress shoes, button up shirt just doesn't seem complete unless you at least put the tie on, I mean if you are going 95% of the way, you might as well all the way. I'm a big fan of comfort or sharp uniform, the middle just seems like it gets the trouble of getting dressed up, but falls short of looking dapper. I will say, dressing the part definitely alters your psychology quite a bit, try it =) So put plainly, Allan C's Trogdor Hoodie with Jeans is 100% comfort, Tim G's Combat Boots and Polo Shirt rock the edgy tip at 100% comfort, My Suit/Tie is 0% comfort, My Skull and Guns Tshirt, with ripped jeans and shell tops are 100% comfort. I am down with all of these =) Event appropriate of course though =)

My friend Vince G. sent me this article, and it got me thinking about the dope threads issue.... its is an interesting short read check it out here.

Investment Banker vs Consultants Rap Battle



So fellow MBA ninja David P sent me this.... straight hilarious
Damn G, he dropped the 5 Force BCG Matrix cipher combo on that ass..... LOL omg.... I miss B school...... well mainly the beer part.... =-)

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Big Ass Snake Can Eat A Plane!



Well ok not a plane or a car.... BUT apparently they found this fossilized snake... that was big enough to eat a cow... yes I said a cow..... If you look below you can see the modern day adult Anaconda vertebra in white.... the GIGANTIC sized grey one behind it is the fossilized vertebra they found recently.... Giant snakes indeed... now that's a snake I'd want off my mutherfarking plane...

Nat Geo Fight Science


This is a pretty interesting comparison of kicks and punches from various styles, although, its too bad they don't give you the weight of the fighters...

Then we have Bas Rutten...... LOL... i read somewhere that this was around ~2200 pounds of force with Bas's Kick... btw this isnt an MMA kick.... this is a Muay Thai Kick...... Baas is hilarious though =) Props to the Father of MMA though... BRUCE LEE =) He was teaching this cross style stuff back in the 1960's.... funny how it takes forever for things to catch up =)

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

I am SpeechLess

Surgeons come up with novel (read: rofl wtf?) way of removing kidneys... I have nothing to say....

The surgery is considered less invasive and could pave the way for an increase in organ donations, it added.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Koala Punch





Ok, so the Super Bowl Commercial where "if you hate your job you punch the koala bear in the face"... just makes me LOL for some reason..... it must be primal instinct to find punching a Koala Bear with glasses and a cup of tea in the face funny =)

HOLY EPIC BACON LOG






































So my friend Allan C. linked me to a pic of him (the asian dude) and his friend making the Holy Epic Bacon Log...... Here is a link to instructions of how to make such an epic symbol of Awesomeness.....

Monday, February 2, 2009

Superbowl Commercials



















So on this Super Bowl Sunday... given the current economic environment, I am betting that most firms are slashing their advertising/marketing budget like crazy.... this opens up some interesting prime time commercial slots for the likes of Mighty Putty and the Snuggie. So I'm kind of curious this year if the Snuggie will get a 5 second Super Bowl spot since everyone else is poor. I've heard that the Cash4Gold franchise snatched up some time... so who knows...

Also... I think it's funny that the Snuggie looks like a damn Wizard Robe just add a hat and your golden.... LARP-tastic....